Criteria in a Potential Mate....

Everybody has standards.  If they told you they don't, they are CLEARLY lying.  (That or they're settling) Sometimes the man's standards differ from the female's...and that's cool. As long as the standards together "make sense" and the two agree...It's all good. Let's get this blog rollin....

Mista's Top 6: 

Interest: One important criteria that defines a potential mate is how interested they are in your life. SHARE something significant that is going on in your life and see if they call to follow up and find out what happened. If they don't mention it on their own.......give them a hint...it's then you will find out if they were really listening.

LOYALTY: Tell them a secret about a mutual friend and see if it gets back to them. A true potential good mate know the value of trust in a relationship. Tend to shake the story up so it won't make sense when it gets back to the other person.

PRIDE: Anyone can tell you to cheer up. It makes them feel good. But if you want to see if they're supportive of you, mention something you're proud of and see if they give you a pat on the back. If they're not driven by jealousy and envy they'll do just that. A true potential good mate is proud of my accomplishments, not jealous of my successes.

Honesty: A true potential good mate is someone who tells you the things that you don't want to hear. They are willing to have you be upset with them if it will help you.... they tell you things that are for your benefit even though they know that it might make you upset with them.

RESPECT: I'll tell her that there is something exciting.... something that is good.... going on in my life but I absolutely prefer not to talk about it right now and see if she presses me on it. There's a difference between curiosity and concern. If she must know, then she's just interested in the gossip and not in me. A good woman will respect my wishes and give me my space... for now. She may bring it up from time to time, because she's interested, but she won't constantly and immediately press me on it if I make it clear that I choose not to discuss it now.

Sacrifice: I want to know is she willing to give up something if it means making me happy. Will she sacrifice her own pleasure for my happiness.. is the word compromise in her vocabulary.. and when the chips are down and its me against her..most people scramble to protect their own interests. Notice if she is the one who has ideas or a plan to help both of you to escape unscathed or whether she just looks to save herself and protect her own interest.

ME's Top 8:

Of course I will have some that will overlap Mista...but for the most part, mine is quite simple.


1. God Fearing: If a man is TRULY a God Fearing man, most of the things, if not all the things Mista listed will come naturally.  He will love God, his family and himself.  There is nothing this man will not do to make this relationship work.


2.  A Communicator: Any mate of mine will not only have to communicate his feelings to me, but EXPECT me to do the same.  No relationship can last without communication. It is the base of loyalty, trust and commitment. 


3. Love for Not only me, but my girls: I am a single parent. No...ur not dating my kids...but ur presence in my life will not only affect me, but them as well.  Im a true believer in the term "package deal." A bad relationship with my kids will send you packing....


4. Respect: Respect me for who I am and what we are to each other.  Change is inevitable...some things will change...some things won't....so don't come into a relationship with me tryna change me. I was who I was when u met me. Accept me or keep it moving.


5.  Honesty: Don't ask me anything you don't want an honest answer to-- and I won't either.  If you have to lie; I don't need u.... 


6. Trust and Commitment: Yes. I put the two together.  They go hand in hand.  Trust my words and actions and u will know Im committed to u and the relationship. Don't go looking for things-- it can very easily be misconstrued....or better yet, ask me.  It may not be what u wanna hear but u did ask. (Refer back to #5)


7.  Financially Sound: Everyone likes to have nice things.  That's cool. But bills come first. You have to be able to manage money...and u have to realize, home comes first.  No exceptions. 


Finally, number 8.


8.  Sexual Compatibility: Call me shallow....a nympho....whatever. I'm just being real. If we are NOT compatible in bed, it won't work. No, sex won't always be what it was (in time) but as for now...we need to match.  No use in frontin. kmsl

8 out of 14 ranks a good mate.  How does ur mate rank?